optimist for a change..

The pros of gaining 40 pounds.
-Bigger boobs
-I get to wear my mom's awesome clothes.
-When I lose weight I know what clothes will be useful during maternity.
-Fun to think if the dryer shrunk it or if it's just me...
-I have a skinny face
-Wardrobe challenge! How many dresses can I use as shirts?
-I can make my friends laugh by quoting Mean Girls' Regina George: "These sweatpants are all that fit me right now."

FUUUCCCKKK!!!!!
now. to the good stuff.
WHY IT SUCKS!!!!
-Once a week somebody asks me if I'm pregnant.

-Entire wardrobe filled with beautiful clothes I am not wearing.
-Going to the mall is no longer fun.

-Getting dressed every morning is an ardous and depressing task.
-My family feels the need to point out the weight I've gained or either question why I'm eating whats on my plate. (Wow! Thankyou for pointing that out. I hadn't realized I'd gained all that weight. It's not like I don't weigh myself everyday before eating, after eating, before shitting, after shitting, before exercising, after exercing, while ovulating and during my period.  Why am I eating this? I don't know... Why did you arrange a family reunion that REVOLVES AROUND FOOD? But please, lets discuss this further.)
-General self loathing.
-I get sad when I'm hungry.
-Just feel heavy.
-$100 short for joining WW and weighing the same.

I'm 5'7 and last week I weighed 157
Dream weight: 127
Will conform with 130/135
I know weight gain happens it just occured so fast. One of my doctors recently told me that a med I'm taking lowers metabolism and he has seen weight gain in all his patients.
Ummmmmm WHY DIDN'T HE TELL ME BEFORE.?!?! I've been taking the med for a year now. I feel I gained a lot and was just eating as I normally do. My mom calmed me down by saying that last year I was extremely weak, needed blood transfusion, and was VERY skinny. The doctor wasn't going to tell me to go on a diet in those conditions.
However, it is a relief. There is an answer to WHY I've gained so much so fast and why it's been particularly hard to loose. Now I have a focus point: metabolism.
Although I'm no longer going to WW I will keep track of points as I can and have bought a Reebook exercise video that really gets me sweating. I've also promised myself to weigh in only on Sundays.

This is a blog about me, not about weight loss. I will post my progress and if i need to vent, I will. When I succeed I'll post before and after pics. That will be awesome.

This week I cheated. I got on the scale today, Saturday. Whatever.  Apparently I've lost 2 pounds. Yay! Little by little.